Sometimes we don’t give meaning to significant things and don’t consider them as critical for our relationship. And we don’t even suspect about some of them. Our ignorance leads to growing problems, pushes us into “depths” of misconceptions, harmful speculations and accusations. Here are five most common mistakes that can hurt the most wonderful relationship.
Say one thing and mean another one…
The lack of clarity is the real problem for people living together. Because we just think, what we know each other so good, that can correctly interpret any phrase. Meanwhile, the average guy doesn’t realize, that the girl makes hints, trying to put him on the trail. However, men, who aren’t able to express the essence of problem, are doing the same thing, they are “beating around the bush” too long and forcing woman to guessing and speculations.
Actions and words
Not everyone of us knows how to beautifully express even the most simple and mundane idea. Public speaking isn’t taught in school. Women, meanwhile, are expecting, as a rule, the confessions, promises and commitments. They are important, especially those are spoken out loud, for example, dreams about the baby or wedding. And it’s important that it doesn’t matter, who is saying and what does he say. It’s quite easy to lie. But you can express both your attitude to situation and a strong sense by actions. If a guy shows respect, love and care every day – don’t make him upset by “extrusion” of the desired words. You are able to know about love without daily repetition of the phrase.
People often believe that their relationship is beautiful and strong, if your unity of interests is evident at every turn and everyone also notices it. You like the same things, spend a lot of time together and quarrel rarely. It’s a tale, isn’t it? Your mind is automatically produces the “I love you”. Meanwhile, astute and a closer look at your subconscious action may surprise you with the result. It turns out, that not everything is so great – you sometimes avoid touching each other. Or do something out of spite. Or rejoice some of the failures of your partner deep down. Are you still holding your confidence of the good quality of the existing relationships? Are you ready to change your partner for the best? It’s necessary to understand…
The media and psychologists teach us that it’s not necessary to make “mountains out of molehills”, because accidental failures in bed is a part of relationships. Unfortunately, such advice can only hurt in a crumbling connection. Instead of realizing that bad sex is a symptom of decay we are trying to find excuses: fatigue, winter, child, alcohol. If you sex disappears or becomes more mechanical and impersonal – it’s time for a long conversation.
It was his fault!
Having relationships problems, we are, as a rule, very emphatic. “He doesn’t help me” or “She doesn’t show her sympathy”, “he prefers chatting with friends” or “she doesn’t care about herself” …
We quickly find those who fail – it can be recently welcomed and coveted partner. But now you just want to pour him mood all days long. There are two problems. The first one – you should identify your goal. Do you want to build relationships or to destroy them completely? If the first option is true – such claims and boorish tone won’t be able to defuse the situation.
Secondly, the truth is that the blame for unpleasant situations is on both partners – only the percentage of negative changes. Only one nonsense, uttered at the wrong time is a weighty reason for divorce. That’s life and that’s the people. If you have a prosecution for your partner, try to understand where was you fault in this situation.